We were relegated before the ship even sank

Football moves pretty fast, if you don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it. This certainly seems to be happnening to poor old David Moyes, while Pep Guardiola is full of the joys of spring and James Milner is as busy as ever.

Elsewhere there are tetchy scenes at Selhurst Park and the Bayern Munich bench, as well as a surprising van update.

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